When You're Considered a Success & Who Defines It

Early Support Systems

In the beginning it's fairly easy to get people on board to support you on your journey of weight loss. Mostly everyone who loves us wants us to be healthier, however there comes a point in time where you have to be your own support system.

Pre-op there are numerous support groups that discuss food, nutrition, exercise, clothing, lifestyle modifications, etc.  And family and friends are excited to see the incredible shrinking you.  They don't seem to mind that you're not eating like you used to as the pounds fall off of you.  But now you've reached that weight on the scale where you're just on the chubby side, very close to normal or even achieved a healthy bmi.  I noticed the more weight I lost, the fewer cheerleaders I had.  It reached a point where I was a size 16 in clothes where people just thought of me as average in size. Even my srugeons considered me a success.  However at this point I still didn't feel like one, and slowly my cheerleaders slipped away.

A Medical Success

The medical community has their own definitions of so many terms.  What they may consider a success may not align with your own personal definition of success.  When my surgeon considered me a success early on I questioned him.  Medically I was a success story, although I wouldn't have personally considered myself one.

Weight loss surgery is considered a success if a person loses 50%  or more of their excess body weight.  So at my highest weight of 350 pounds, losing 100 pounds would have been considered a success.  So at 5'5" tall and 250 pound I would have been a walking success story for bariatric surgery?   The American Society for Metabolic and Bariatric Surgery (ASMBS) cited that 90 % of patients are able to keep off a 50% loss.

At 250 pounds I was still fat, with a BMI of 41.6, technically Class 3 obese.  Yes still in class 3.  I hardly consider that a success.  But that's the standard measure of that surgeons go by.    So how did I get myself to a normal BMI of under 25?  I took bariatric surgery for what it was, a tool.  Surgery alone wasn't going to burn off years and over 200 pounds of excess body weight.  I dramatically changed my whole entire lifestyle and became my own cheerleader.

Lifestyle Modifications

So my journey from 250 pounds down another 100+ pounds to a normal BMI wasn't even expected by my surgeon.  That part was done through nutrition and exercise.  Along the way there were many challenges and still are.  There are still goals I want to achieve for myself.  It's no longer about being a medical success but about being a personal success.

Lifestyle modification is no easy task, even with a helpful support system.  Eventually you have to be the one to motivate yourself by becoming your own personal cheerleader.  If that motivation doesn't come from inside yourself chances are you aren't going to make it past being a medical success.

My sedentary lifestyle had changed to a very active one.  I lost interest in going out to eat with friends and socializing over food.  I was more interested in spending time doing an activity.  Spending hours eating was a behavior that wasn't going to help me meet my goals.

Some of my friends weren't interested in a more active lifestyle, so I saw them less and less over time.  I made new friends who were interested in a healthier lifestyle.  I enjoyed more activities and sports with my own children.  My sons became my work out buddies.  For me it was a win win situation.  Early on we cut out trips to Mc Donalds.  I told the boys, "Mc Donalds is dead!"  They took it to heart and we stopped going there.  Years later my boys don't even think about going there.  I have 3 sons who value their health and physically push themselves.  They're constantly inspiring me to be healthier and work harder.

A benefit of changing to a healthier lifestyle is that my kids are growing up around it.  When I first had surgery they were 3, 6 and 7 years old. They've had the benefit of seeing me change my eating patterns,  having a balanced diet, very limited junk food and realizing that if you set your mind to it you can reach your goals.  And at 12, 15 and 16 years old my sons are amazing people.  Each with their own physical and intellectual goals in life.  They're all out there pursuing them and have such internal motivation that it pushes me to do more.    

Welcome to life in a brand new body.  From this point on it's all about maintaining a healthy weight and making choices.  Yes, now it's a choice of eating, exercising and staying healthy.  Maintaining the weight is a balancing act that many people don't think about.  The statistics for weight regain following weight loss surgery are not all that positive.  People may lapse into poor eating habits at their goal weight, and a lapse may turn into a relapse.  The real work is done here, goals are set, revisited and revised.